Martin, That statement in itself is something one hears frequently - It is a sure sign that the opinion must be investigated in depth and an explanation of “WHY” the statement may be valid demanded ?
It is usually a good sign that the statement is being made by someone who does not really understand and therefore is unable to explain their view. They choose to use the “Strict Parental Approach” to evade the necessity for further explanation.
In it’s application to children, it is an attitude more appropriate to a time when children and women were thought of as “Delicate flowers who needed to be protected from reality” - in the 1900s to 1950s perhaps.
“Appeal to Venerable Authority” is a well known and well documented “Logic Fallacy”
Now I am Not saying your missus does not know what she is talking about, but we have no evidence as to what level she has studied the subject at ? What qulaificatios she holds and what papers she has written on the subject ? - Ergo we have nothing to make that judgement on.
Sadly that statement is simply incorrect and clearly an opinion of someone who has never read ANY of Dr Eric Berne’s stuff !
His whole analyses are based on the interaction of the internal “Parent, Adult and Child” and he explains in great detail with copious examples how we as “parents” or “Inflluencers” can completely and unintentionally insert behaviour and thought patterns into our children, which mimic our own biases and thought patterns. We write their life scripts and it is hard for a person with a bad script to change it !
He gives an example of a loving mother who tells her child in a moment of frustration “You’ll end up in prison - you will”
The child is a good child and relies on his mother for leadership and understands that this is what is expected of him. The forecast is forgotten, but his “Child” (inner child approximately equals subconscious mind) knows the truth and works away in the background to make his destiny come to fruition. Sure enough as a young adult, he is sent to prison.
Berne says that the statement only needs to be repeated once or twice to make it a part of the child’s “Life Script”
Berne was the father of “Transactional Analysis” out of which came other interesting stuff you may have heard of - “quick fixes” like - Neuro Linguistic Programming and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy !
His own books “Games People Play”, “I’m ok you’re ok” and “What do you say after you say hello?” are truly informative and well worth reading for parents and child carers. Some (Myself included) would say “Essential reading”.
A decent book written by one of his followers is this
And you say “It doesn’t apply to chldren” ???
A friend of mine is a qualified medical doctor (You have to be in the uk to become: ) A Chartered Psychologist, Trauma Specialist and LAw Society Accredited Expert witness. She is in great demand by Health Authorities throughout the country to intervene in issues of child (and parent) behaviour.
She has often said to me “Children need to know the truth” They must be told the truth in order to make sense of the world. Children are incredible resilient, they can cope with ANything - But they must be told the whole truth ! and then have is talked through with them.
If that means getting them a “demo account” on Forex - so be it !
"Not UP FOR DEBATE " ? _ No mate not only is it “Up for debate” - but debate and discussion are ESSENTIAL !
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