Our family home was remote, we had no electricity.
Then one day my dad announced we were to get a generator, there was great excitement when the house was wired and we could press a button and have light.
Even more excitement followed - we got a b&w TV - we all sat enthralled around this little box.
After a time the TV began to malfunction, it had a habit of losing sound, we used to say that it was all picture and no sound.
Soon the excitement had turned to frustration.
After over 40 years of marriage I often think of that little TV. When we have quarreled there can be a period of all picture and no sound, the key for me is to fix the sound as soon as possible, before frustration sets in.
I have found three magic words that have helped me bring the sound back.
Got myself a Kindle sample of that one! Looks very interesting! And the fact that you said it changed your life⌠sold!
I read a book once that said the SUREST sign that itâs time to throw in the towel is when you or the other person feels contempt and lack of respect towards the other. If youâre already at this stage, they say no amount of counseling can help.
Reading through @bradley79âs post, perhaps you guys arenât at that level yet. Maybe @anon46773462 is right, it could be because of the struggles of taking care of a 1 year oldâŚ
[quote=âpurtle, post:22, topic:152269â]
Got myself a Kindle sample of that one! Looks very interesting! And the fact that you said it changed your life⌠sold![/quote]
[quote=âFalstaff, post:22, topic:152269â]
As the maintenance period is waning, we tend to start to see a huge number of âfaultsâ in our partner and grow over time to actively dislike them, often to the stage of âcanât stand to be near themâ and âwant a swapâ.[/quote]
In honesty, itâs good to see the comments from @anon46773462 and @peterma here. They and I are of a similar generation âpre-divorceâ or almost so.
The time I spoke of as âyouâve made your bed - You must lie in it !â era. The fact is that after the descent in âloveâ from the âMaintenance periodâ to
If the couple persist for some time, the chart again turns upward and crosses the âX axis neutralityâ into a stage of real Love and friendship - much as you might feel towards your children.
There is no doubt in my mind that both are giving their honest real experiences here. @anon46773462 in particular gives some of the underlying reasons why
could be the case - and if it is, then it can be cured with some help.
In mild forms the action Manxx suggests can probably be effective and certainly show an understanding attitude.
However, my experience was somewhat different.
My own âLife Scriptâ was somewhat less benevolent than theirs and my own âgamesâ whilst altruistic (as they appeared to me) - were in many ways self destructive !
I appeared to have a â5 year cycleâ and I said "my life is not a Novel - itâs a series of short stories ! "
When on the Holiday I spoke of, I watched some boys diving into the sea off a high rock, whilst I lay on the beach with âmy ladyâ and said âiâm gonna do thatâ - SO I swam over to them. The rock was high and the dive was steep. and as I stood there, I could hear my Dad saying to me in my head -
"You donât have to do this ! - What if there is a rock just under the water and you hit it ? " - âNobody is watching really - you donât have to do this !â
After reading part of the book, I said (in my head - âPossibly dad - but I see no evidence of any such danger. - I give myself permission - to take that risk !â
You would not believe how proud of myself I was as I swam back with this new found power !
and I was in my mid 40âs !
This stuff will help some more than others, but for anyone with young children to rear themselves - it is huge !
My thanks to all threeof you ( & @CoinLady ) for your contributions and I hope we have managed to help the lad towards a resolution between us.
I would really appreciate it if you could all take a look at this other thread
Fathers day is a day to show your emotions, feelings, and reapect for your father. We need to respect our parents as much as we can. A father is the most faithful person you habe in your life along with your mother. So, always make them happy!
I think father see his shadow in his child as he want him to become like him and make him proud. A father teaches us how to talk, how to walk, how to eat, and how to handle others. My father is my mentor, my teacher, and my everything. I want to make him feel proud!
Thank you for that post @VarSine Iâm sure there were many in the Western world who used to feel that way to and a few perhaps who still do. (the lucky ones)
Yesterday (19th November) was âInternational Mens Dayâ - but nobody seemed to notice - I looked at the website, but was rather disappointed about itâs apologetic tone !
"This year, the theme for International Menâs Day is positive male role models.
Organisers have cited the effect of the number of children growing up with a suitable male role model and the effect that this could have on the rest of their lives."
Iâm not sure that was what it was meant to say - I rather think the word âwithâ should have read âwithoutâ !
I then took a look at the Fathers for justice website and found a more realistic attitude ;
" Mission âBy the end of today, another 200 children will have been cruelly separated from their fathers in secret family courts.â Matt OâConnor, Founder, Fathers4Justice Fatherlessness is an obscenity. No child should be denied their human right to a father yet nearly 1 in 3 children now lives without a father in the UK â thatâs nearly 4 million fatherless children.
_ _ Help us end the cruel & degrading treatment of families by the government. "
Hereâs a story from another abused father - who refused to just quietly âGo away and dieâ
" Our Story Find out how one manâs experience in the secret family courts led to the creation of Fathers4Justice, one of the worldâs leading campaign groups."
Fascinating man, with 80,000 families signed up and providing help and advice to other desperate families - even to the likes of Guy Richie in his battle with Madonna !
Amazing journey and well done mate for taking down the âdesperateâ image and putting up a professional attitude which barring further âFoul Playâ by the authorities and others, is bound to succeed.
This little biography is powerful stuff and well worth the read !
You an see why âtheyâ are so damn scared of this man, his partner and their followers. Interestingly 84% of the public actually Agree with his main demand as demonstrated by this You Gov poll !
Which seems to demonstrate that the law is completely wrong in validating the claims to âvictimhoodâ of a very small minority of vociferous and strident âothersâ !
Whilst it is easy to see potential advances as small victories the reality is still - as this other picture ;
Interesting stuff here from Australia - âfatherâs dayâ to become âSpecial personâs dayâ - There seems to be an influx of pretty women batting for blokes against these toxic feminists !
Well according to Peterson, men have no chance whatever of defending themselves and he called on Real women to defend men against these mad women !
Thanks girls - Youâre younger than my daughters - but we, real men, appreciate it no end ! x
As we can see - When people speak up for men and boys - They get deleted, demonetised - or deplatformed
Then another one picks up the baton and speaks the truth in his stead
[Edit - coach Greg Adams speaks a lot of sense to young men and helps them to protect and better themselves in a hostile world. This was published TODAY and in spite of the riots arson and violence âAgainst white racismâ - you will note that he says not a single word of racism - the âred-Pilledâ members of the human race speak to each other as though race doesnât matter at all - which to us - it doesnât !]
FAtherâs Day again here in uk
For all you kids with no dads, or dads you arenât allowed to see - Go find him when you are able to and give him a big hug ! - Girls - donât deprive your own kids of dads - they wonât like you for it when they grow up x
For all you dads not allowed to see your kids today - I feel for ya lads - stick with it mate - Itâs NOT Your fault !
