Part 2…
So this brings me to the issue of focus, and more specifically, the OTHER point in the Eric Thomas video I mentioned earlier. Now you have to remember when watching that video, that Mr Thomas was making that speech to class of teenagers, and teenagers have different ideas as to what is vital in life in comparison to us…people who aren’t teenagers LOL!
One of those vital things is a teenagers mobile phone (cell phone for our American cousins). I know how important this is to a teenager, I have a teenager, she’d rather give up a body part, maybe even a vital organ or two before she gave up her ‘only link to real people’. Her mother and I don’t get offended by that comment.
He told them:
[I]“If you give up your cell phone you will be successful, but your cell phone is more important to you than your success. I’m going to say it again, I’m going to hurt somebody. Some of you need to give up your cell phone because the time you’re spending on your cell phone could be used for your success. The time you could be using to be successful, you’re using on your cell phone and your cell phone ain’t bringing you nothing but a bill.”[/I]
The point?
The point is, how does ANYBODY become successful in life? How do they become successful in business, in sport, in science or in any other field you care to mention? How do they do that? Let me give you a hint just in case you’re struggling a little there.
Gary player, one of the most famous names in golf, (and incidentally the guy I was named after, and no, my first name isn’t Player) was once accused of being a very lucky guy when playing out of bunkers. His reply to that was, “Yes I am, and the more I practice, the luckier I get.”
People become successful through hard work and practice. When they have finished the hard work and the practice, they work harder and practice some more, that’s the only way it comes. Santa don’t gift wrap success. And to keep working hard, and to keep practicing your craft for the time needed in order to become successful requires an incredible level of focus.
For me, as I mentioned in a previous post, that’s the reason behind the 95% statistic that gets so readily thrown into the mix. Most people, just don’t give that level of focus. They don’t give it in work, they don’t give it in life and then they spend the rest of their miserable fu***** existences *****ing about how THEY didn’t make it big.
Now I’m not knocking them because I’ve been one of them so far, but it’s why we are where we are, no other reason.
So forget your desire to learn about indicators and moving averages and stars and planets and ribbons and bows and bells and whistles, none of it matters, I assure you. Because without focus, it all useless, it’s all c**p, it means nothing.
Don’t tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon may well be a great attitude, but without the proper focus, it don’t fu***ng matter my son because your arse ain’t getting off the ground in the first place.
So it’s focus, it’s all about the focus. Hell even I just had to re-read the very first post I made on this thread, and in particular the sentence in red, “Should I even be here at all?” I’m over a year and a half in and I’m asking myself that. That in itself has me wondering if this IS for me after all.
But that said, I’d hate to walk away, failed but knowing I never truly gave myself a chance in the first place. To lose knowing you never gave it the best shot you possibly must be the worse feeling ever. So I won’t do that. But if I do give it my best, and still fail, then fair enough, it didn’t work, I tried.
There are a couple of quotes I’d like to add at this point. The first one comes from a trader called Shirley Hudson. I don’t know how well known Shirley Hudson is or isn’t, but I lifted this part from an interview she did on youtube. I just thought it summed up the attitude required for this business:
[I]“Trading, for most of us, is a lonely job, and you need the support of a common group of people, focused in the same direction you are. Not trying to blog, not trying to take your time, not sitting there on skype having fun conversations, but paying attention to what’s important to feeding your mind and feeding your future success in this business.”[/I]
That quote alone, is what made me NOT quit this forum the other night if I’m honest, because if you’re going to learn, it helps if you’re surrounded by good people who also want to learn, which is what you lot surely are.
The second quote also deals with the people you chose to surround yourself with in your quest to become successful in any, or all, walks of life. It comes from that other well known philosopher, 50 cent. It has been censored ever so slightly for the purpose of this post.
[I]
“You know what my grand-father told me? You’ll get as far as the mother-fs you talk to for no reason. You’ll be as successful as the mother-fs you talk to for no reason. What I mean is, if your spending your day talking to some guy (not the word 50 used) who ain’t got nothing going on, what the fk kind of information can he offer you? Can he help you learn? Can he teach you something in the conversation? Get the fk outta here.”[/I]
My teenage daughter wants to go to University after school to study medicine. Even as a little girl she always wanted to become a doctor. To be fair to her, she’s worked so hard all through school, done well in her exams and now she’s in the final year when the important exams are looming next May.
Just in the last few months though, she’s started to lose a little of the focus and has started to notice most of the other kids her age who are going out on the town, going to parties, some of them are getting drunk but as is the nature of these things with kids that age, it all seems to get glamourised and made out to be the ‘cool’ thing to be doing.
A few weeks ago she asked me, “How come I don’t get to go to the parties or go out on the town?”
This is roughly what I told her.
[I]“Unfortunately, you don’t get to play that game, not yet anyway. The path you’ve chosen to take requires that you pay ALL of your attention to achieving the goal that you yourself set. Your mother or I never told you to become a doctor. We never held a gun to your head and told you that if you didn’t do it, the family would live a life of misery and it would be all your fault.
You made a free, conscious decision to take that path and you made that decision a long time ago. And I’m the first to admit to you that you’ve worked bloody hard for a long time. It couldn’t have been easy. It can’t be easy watching your friends doing the things they’re doing and never being part of it. It can’t be easy listening to them telling the tales of their weekends and the fun they had as you walk quietly back to the solitude of your bedroom to study again and again and again.
But that was, and still is, your choice and I’m the proudest guy in the world that you made it and had the strength to see it through as far as you have already. But you go talk to those other kids and ask them what their ambitions are and the highest ambition amongst them is your friend Heather who wants to be a hairdresser.
Now no offense to hairdressers, but when you take a group of 16 year old kids, a group of kids with their entire lives in front of them and that’s as high as any of them are aiming then something’s wrong. And I already know what kind of life awaits them because I’ve already lived it.
School meant nothing to me, I hated the place. But the reality of life is that at some point you have to pay for it. You either pay up front and sacrifice your early years by working hard on your education to secure a longer period of happiness, which is the rest of your life.
Or, you live it up when you’re young, blow off the education for the few quick years that is your youth and then pay for it the rest of your life. And be assured, you DO pay for it for the rest of your life.
Eeither way it’s your decision. But just remember this always. If you do decide to pack it all in now, and decide to go off and piss around with your mates, don’t ever blame anyone else for the path your life takes, because that too was your decision.
If you’re going to do something, something that requires hard work, then you need to be prepared to put the hard work in, regardless of what’s going on around you. Otherwise…you’d better learn how to do a bloody perm and highlights!"[/I]
Oh if I could only follow that advice myself eh??
So my problem has been, and still is, the focus and the discipline. It is not my intention to give up this thread but I’ve given myself until the end of March 2013, no particular reason for that specific date, just gives me 3 good months to show myself what I can or can’t do.
If by that time, nothing has improved regards my trading practices, then it will be time to move on, maybe teach trading LOL!!
AS for this thread between now and then, I may or may not frequent it as often, I truly don’t know yet. But what I do know is that when I am here, I’ll be here to talk, learn and focus on trading. I’m not saying we can’t have a giggle, what I’m saying is that I have a tendency to go off on a tangent sometimes for too long, that I have to change.
I won’t apologise for the length of this post, sometimes we all just need to howl at the moon to makes ourselves feel a bit better. Maybe just to re-focus a bit.
As for the “trading club” idea I’m still up for that if we can sort out quickly how we’re going to do it. I think we’re up to 3 members now so that could be promising.
Don’t know if I’ll be posting again this week, probably will mind you now that I have the mobile office up and going.
Anyway, that’s long enough for any post, if I think of chapter 2, I’ll put it on.
I will just add this though before I let y’all go. Eric Thomas sure knows how to make an inspirational video. Indeed, ST and I have both commented in conversation that we do like that sort of shot in the arm motivation. But recently I’m of a mind to look to a different source for inspiration to motivate myself to improve and learn as a trader, and I would urge you all to do the same.
Going back to the start of this mega post, if you do ever catch yourself in one of those “moments”, reflecting on what’s going wrong in your lives and what makes you unhappy, keep that image of whatever it is in your mind. Make it bigger, make the colours richer, make the noises louder and let the feeling of the pain it gives you hurt even more. Burn it into your brain like your branding a cow, burn it in there for all eternity.
And every time you think of giving up, you think of that thing, you re-focus and get up again and keep going. Be your own life coach.
Take care you lot, talk soon.
HoG
but i really do think this is relevant and even more important. I once had a life changing experience. I had read about being addicted to caffeine and the lethargic effects of soda in January 2009. For three months I kept telling myself I was going to quit (after i finished the soda i was drinking or the pack i had just bought). So here it is April and I’m driving down the road drinking the best soda on Earth Barq’s root beer. And I’m thinking to myself “man I really need to quit drinking these this is going to be my last one”. And then it hits me Jaren you keep putting this off if you dont do it now you wont do it. So then and there on highway M I made the resolution not that this would be my last soda or last drink but that I had already had my last sip. I threw the rest out the window and just did it. Whatever it is you wanna do or dont wanna do never say “next week” or tomorrow or when i have more money. Just do it otherwise you wont ever. Also I’ve had a few beers so this might be a little more relevant in my head than it is :D.